choosing change
A year ago this week, I agreed to relocate to Denmark. I cried all the way from my office to the hotel, overwhelmed with anxiety and hoping I wasn't making the biggest mistake of my life. I knew what I had but I didn't know what I was getting into, and I was pretty sure I didn't have a good handle on what I was giving up, and that was terrifying.
That might sound a little weird, but it's that whole Joni Mitchell "you don't know what you've got 'til it's gone" thing. That line from Big Yellow Taxi stuck in my head, nagging me for months, and choosing change was one of the most frightening things I've ever done.
Coming full circle with my decision, I know now that it's ok to choose something different. The leaves fall, the earth goes dormant, then it slowly comes alive again.
Tonight, instead of dreading as I have for so many years, the impending Thanksgiving and Christmas traditions of expectations, the requisite dead bird, and snide comments, I'm looking forward to a week in Italy, followed by a low stress Thanksgiving, and Christmas among friends.
The most frightening part of this change was choosing it. But true to nature, the winter has passed, and everything is coming alive again. I'm off to Italy on Sunday :)
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7 comments:
Enjoy your trip and holidays!
--Cari
I'm so thrilled for you, though I miss you here (and your holiday stories. Heh.) xoxo
Did you take that picture? Absolutely beautiful! Enjoy Italy!
Have a really good holiday. By the way, love the new picture x
Beautiful photo of the Autumn leaves!
Enjoy your trip to Italy, and the low stress, snipe-free holidays :)
I did that too, twice. Once when I moved from the east coast to the west and left my birth family behind. Then recently moving to the Pacific Northwest, leaving my children and grand children behind.
Its scary but when its calling you, you have to do it. My daughter is so afraid of change shes frozen by it and wont make choices. It makes me sad.
I feel whats the worst that can happen? You choose what you think will make you happy and if it doesnt you go back to where you were. But at least you have the knowledge and experience for the next time. Ive loved reading about your adventures here. While I seem the pioneer in my family, I dont think Id have what it takes to live abroad like you. But I do envy you ...the holidays in Italy? Sounds like what dreams are made of :)
Lovely Sage. Yes...it's true...so many of us mistake dormancy for death. Not so...nothing dies...it just changes form. Your new form of life intrigues...enchants. As always, thank you for sharing your journey.
x0x
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